Story - Our Last Kiss, Our Mistakes. Season 1 - Episode 2.

Someone once said "The beholder of the
relationship, is the one that cares less"
Two days after our union and 2 months and 17 days
before he leaves for University, our relationship was
more than amazing each day was better than the
last, I wanted to shout my happiness to the world
but I couldn't well not without my parents finding
out. I come from a lower class family according to
society standards, a product product of a domestic
worker because my mothers job doesn't begin to
define and my father has a 9-5 job what he does? I
have no idea but he takes a laptop to work so it
must be important again that is based on society
and their standards. We have DSTV and I attend
multi racial school, but my brother and sister both
went to local schools which took nothing from their
education. My sister moved to Joburg after matric
and my brother is currently studying Marketing,
according to my standards domestic workers make
the best mothers. Well sometimes. I call my father
dad but others call him Mthunzi and my mom is
mama but those older call her Thandi, my parents
and I have a basic relationship nothing to write
books about but its not their fault. I prefer being an
outsider, keeps me different and I love being
different.
Mama"Nguwe ophekayo"
I laughed at her, she smiled back.
Mama"Fezi ngathi ulahlekile"
She analyzed my eyes, you know you fussy mothers
are.
Me"Tired, trying to pass grade 11"
Couldn't tell my mother my relationship issues
without telling her about getting married.
Mama"Unjalo ke wena, ib@ngathi awuthandwa"
When she said that, my heart broke a little but black
mothers never understand without including the
belt in our problems.

Me"Think Olwethu yagula"
She just nodded
Me"That's why ndingathethi because when I do, you
dont listen ngathi I bore you"
She sat down and looked at me, guess that meant I
can talk.
Me"Uhm Olwethu is g@y"
She nodded
Me"And being g@y is hard, the constant judgement
can break someone and he may act brave but he is
dying inside. Ngathi his problems are mine lately,
like I feel empty because my pillar is dying inside
and I cannot preach about ignorance without being
punched or being called a coconut"
Mama"Then let his family deal with it, focus on
yourself"
Me"But he is my friend"
Mama"Yes, yitshomi and sometimes we have to
uqhelisana iboundries Fezeka! awunoncenda wonke
umntu"
Me"Yeka"
Mama"Akhonto ndizo yeka,Mntanam in this world
abantu take advantage of umntu omuncu! if uzoba
dom they'll show you flames"
I stood up and took my phone with me
Mama"yeke ndizopheka"
I walked to Gcobani's house, he stayed near yet far
from me depending on my mood. Thinking about my
conversation with Mama, how can I watch someone I
love suffer and not do anything about it. I called my
idiot and he picked up after the first ring as usual.
Gcobani"Uphandle?"
I laughed
Me"We have 10 minutes"
Gcobani"Ndizophuma"
I dont know what is like to date someone else and
some days, I wish I could maybe I am too much
because in the movies I am labeled as "too much"
Gcobani"Cinga phi?"
He sat on a rock next to me
Me"Who am I?"
He laughed and I giggled too
Gcobani"Hahaha rha ne drama mntana ndini"
Not the response I was looking for but I accepted.
Me"Ndikhaphe"
He stood up and we walked in silence, yet my heart
spoke in volumes. I wanted to tell him what I was
thinking but I couldn't without losing him or losing
everything that I. believe in.
Me"Think I want out"
He held my hand tighter with saying anything then
he let go.
Gcobani"That will be my pain when you let go"

Me"Andiyazi omnye umntu but you, I never
experienced love because ndaqala kuwe yonke into.
What if I am whats wrong with you? you'd never
know because kwasoloko uhleli nam"
Gcoban"then why did we get married"
Me"Because you felt guilty! like you owe me love or
something"
We walked in silence again until we reached Limba(a
street) our separating point.
Gcobani"Fey"
Me"Heh"
Gcobani"He doesn't love you, he just knows better
because umdala"
I acted surprised
Gcobani"Sundibhanxa"
Me"We not dating"
Gcobani"So in the meantime ndithini mna?"
Me"You explore, love someone else just let me
breathe nje kancinci"
Gcobani"Fe …"
Me"Just two months"
He walked away and I stood there watching him
walk., not feeling any regret or remorse not even an
ounce of guilt.
Me"I am doing this for you"
I said it as if he would hear me, although he was
right there was someone and he was saying all the
right things but mostly he thought I was breath
taking. I decided to call him on my way home, it
went to voicemail. I decided to assume he was in
class, Lwazi was studying business management at
Nmmu and he knew so much, he knew club owners,
he could drive but most of all he found me
attractive. I called again after 15 minutes.
Lwazi"Hey"
Me"Calling to confirm tomorrow"
my heart beat accelerated fast
Lwazi"Ngathi kuzo netha, I have a test at 08:00 so
I'll pick you up after that"
He wrote tests on saturday, such things fascinated
me

Me"See you tomorrow"
Lwazi"Hahaha sho baby"
wasn't sure why we were laughing so I hung up, I
finally got home and everyone was there . I took my
food and sat next to my brother, logged in on
Facebook because my dumb phone didn't support
whatsapp. My inbox was filled with messages from
Gcobani but one made me sob in silence
" Is this about your virginity? I know you and noba in
your mind this is where oura story ends . Mfondini
don't let other relationship stories narrate our future
together, we are not your friends"
I wiped my tears and replied
"I love you, see you monday tata wants us to spring
clean ngomso"
first of many lies*

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